From: Daibhid Cheinnedelh
Newsgroups: alt.fan.pratchett
Subject: [I] Will Survive apology (and song)
Date: Tue, 04 May 1999 17:25:24 GMT
Some time ago "I Won't Revise", an amusing parody of "I Will Survive", was posted on this group. Without checking the facts I immediately replied to sya that I knew the author, my predecessor as EU Sciffysoc Jed. (Visit her site at www.ed.ac.uk/~sesoc/jedweb (possibly no longer valid) for more song parody).
As a number of people, including Jed herself, have pointed out, she didn't. (She did however write all the other IWS parodies on the site hence my confusion.) I offer the deepest afpologies. (Can a humble newbie do afpologies, or do I have to stick with ordinary apologies?)
I also offer another IWS parody, which was definitely written by me.
<clears throat>
*RINCEWIND:*
I've always been afraid,
I've been petrified
Ever since I helped that tourist no-one's on my side.
Every time I think it's over I want to break into song,
But I'm proved wrong,
A new adventure comes along.
I don't look back,
I just make space,
As far as I'm concerned every encounter is a race.
Maybe I'm a coward, but I'm fine with that you see,
Everybody has a talent, and mine is just to flee
So I go,
Straight through the door.
Don't turn around, no, I just keep on pumping floor.
Nothing can catch you if your ready to fly.
Mustn't stumble,
Oh shit, this time I'm gonna die!
Oh no, not I,
I will survive,
As long as I know how to run I might just stay alive.
It's hard to do what's best,
With a homocidal chest,
But I'll survive.
I will survive.
Yeah, yeah!
*PATRITIAN:*
Without me this city would just fall apart,
A pragmatic attitude is the right place to start.
I saw that crime could be designed to regulate itself.
Some people die,
But the city still runs high.
When I came back
From that Leshp place
It was almost worth it just to see the look upon Rust's face.
The city runs like clockwork, and I'm the man with the key,
And everybody knows it, so they don't bother me.
I'm still in charge,
Because it's true,
What people want is leadership, it's nothing new.
Some people maybe try,
To complain that they're not free,
But freedom is uncertian; you know where you are with me.
I won't go,
I've said before,
I've really found out,
Humanity's score.
Stabilty, not justice, is what people desire,
This town won't crumble,
At least until I die.
Oh not I,
I will survive.
Nobody really likes me, but I'm still worth more alive.
With a mercentile empire,
To rival a Zoon Liar,
I will survive.
I will survive
Yeah, Yeah!
Dave
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